Silently kicking and screaming.

Watch us stand tall, and quietly fall. As the world stops spinning and the tasks of tomorrow have all been swept under carpets.

Watch as the world turns grey. Though the sun shines bright and sits in it's harness making other things grow.

Watch as the water surrounds the carcass. As the breathing starts gasping until the feeling in limbs has vanished.

Watch as I sit. Looking out a window alone.. wandering horrible mental paths and wondering what's going on down the road.

Watch the sleeping. For those same wonderful times of rest aren't so willing when so many cycles of circle do their duty.

Watch limbs swing wild. As things catch a flame and confusion and pain stand tall and cause you to quietly fall.

The Smell of floating soap

Going through things that I wasn't part of, but was the cause of, creates way too many thought bubbles.

Bubble 1 - Wishing for time to vanquish time, does nothing but contend with the future. This future is the only thing I can think about.

Bubble 2 - All biological warfare in my brain will be spoken of and fixed with speech. Hopefully, you can share in the same way, and nothing will get in the way.

Bubble 3 - Liars lie. That's why they don't exist anymore. Keeping it that way will be a large addition to the last bubble.

Bubble 4 - Distance traveled will continue so, but dream's state that it will only be a problem for a short distance of days.

Bubble 5 - There isn't anything I can do to change the blank spots of years. I only have the ability to do my best to fill in these blanks the best I can. They're always going to be there with scribblings instead of memories.

Bubble 6 - I have never experienced such darkening, empty craters, that some how; vomit sadness, fear, excitement, hate, love, over focused distraction, and eagerness. (In between each of the last commas is another word and comma.)

Bubble 7 - There are things that sit in this cave and speak to me in ways I don't know how to relate to. The only thing I know is they bleed, and they bleed so well, that it won't wash off.

Bubble 8 - I've witnessed many horrible things throughout this fortnight of life. I know of only one thing that makes them go, and then stay, just where they should be.

Bubble 9 - I can't start to understand something that is too difficult to comprehend. I've never in my days found something so confusing that I sometimes don't know how or what to do. But, I'm pretty damned sure I know exactly what it is, and want to experience it with you.

Bubble 10 - There is only one prescription to these parallels.

my Tank.

Thank you Jennifer

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/81686591/

Thank you Jeff.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRBLmogRL4c

do you know if you're really saved

Well they say you only feel alive - when you are about die

So when those nukes are fallin - life’ll be callin

And if you ain’t want to deal - then put them cards away

Cause the devils always laughin - and god’ll get his way

When you realize - the time flies and your kickin cans in hell

You’ll wish you was back here dealing - and giggling up a spell

Pills - razor - drink - noose

Are you sinning the sins when your runnin loose

Bullet - drown - jump - blades

Do you know if you’re really saved

One thing we all can count on - is that ground being cold

Except them few that decide - a vase of charred bone

And if you ain’t want fly - better stay home from the pack

Cause the reapers always reaping - crazie’s always attack

When you realize - the time flies and torture’s ran it’s toll

You’ll wish you were flying - amuck like some sort of fool

Pills - razor - drink - noose

Are you sinning the sins when your runnin loose

Bullet - drown - jump - blades

Do you know if you’re really saved

Subway conversation

He Turns to a random girl next to him on a subway car.

Maybe I'll kill myself today.

Umm... Do you think it's wise..?

I don't think it's unwise.

Where do you think you'll end up if you do?

Probably, in a box in the ground.

Ah.. Not much for afterlife conversation?

Well, I just said that I will end up in a box in the ground.

Ah. I'll rephrase.. Not much of a spiritual afterlife conversationilist?

What's there to talk about?

Well you know what some people believe. I just didn't know if you did.

I don't believe what other people say 99% of the time. So why would i believe there other lies?

I don't know. I was just trying to talk.

Ah... talk.

Well, I mean I don't know if it's the best decision to make.

Why's that?

Well, You have a lot of stuff to finish.

I have started a lot of projects, but they were just time killers honestly.

Oh.. something to keep the mind busy?

Yeah. . . ... It worked sometimes.

I was never really good at anything artistic, but i used to sit and do that type of shit anyways.

I never really cared if i was good at it or not. I just don't really want to do it anymore.

I see.

Yeah.. Everything's just kinda dead anyway.

That's not really our fault though.

That all depends on who you mean by our.

Well I mean you and me. Not the world.

Honestly, It's everyone's fault for buying all these things we never needed. We're all guilty of it. But, it all started as art or ideas at some point. And most people want to sell that stuff.

Is that what you were going for?

Not really. I just liked to do some of it. Other stuff I liked to do for a while. Other stuff.. I just did it to pass time.

All I ever do is work... really.

Well, that really just goes back into what we just said. Too much shit got commercialized and everyone wanted it. Idiots made money and made more things that really didn't need to be made.

Yeah.. Totally. Like, french fries.. how many fucking types of french fries can we have?

Fries is a good example. They aren't really that great to begin with. Everyone eats them with other types of condiments. What's the point in eating something if it doesn't taste good to start with?

Well, that's pretty much everything in life. Why buy crap you don't need just to buy more stuff to go with it?

True. True. Time killers. So we don't see that life is pointless, and we're just hear now to reinvest in the country we live in.

I honestly wouldn't care that much about any of this, if i didn't have to do shit like sit in a tube to work in back everyday. I think shit was probably millions of times easier when you just built the walls to a place. Sold whatever the town didn't sell and lived in your business. You didn't have to leave where you lived. Everyone in the town knew you. Now it's like i'm surrounded by a billion strangers that all ignore me with head nods and sorry i bumped into you looks.

I can say i don't talk to many people on these. In fact i don't think I've ever had a conversation with someone that was worth having.

Thanks for that. I appreciate it.

Oh. Thank you for not hitting on me or 'accidentally' trying to grope me.

People do that to you often?

Often enough to piss me off. But, what am I really going to do about something there is no proof of.

That's how the world works now though. If you can't prove it, it never happened.

Caught Red Handed is the only way to get anything done.

Yeah.. Or just do it yourself.

What do you mean?

If you turned and stabbed someone that was groping you, you could easily play it off like he was assaulting you. Because, I mean, he was.

hmm.. I guess I never really thought of that.

It's the easiest to notice things that are never seen.

The snake that bites you, yeah?

Oh yeah. That snake.

Well this is my stop.

It was nice meeting you.

It was nice meeting you as well.

Are you really going to kill yourself today?

Not anymore.

Oh?

Yeah.. sometimes it takes the knowledge of knowing someone else on the planet knows that the surroundings are painted so thick that the shit will always stink.

Well.. I appreciate that i could help out.

As am I.

The subway car comes to a hault.

You have a good one.

Do the same.

The girl steps off the car and rush hour of five P.M. comes in the car. The man stands up walks over to some shady looking fellows. He waits until they acknowledge his presence and he pulls a gun out of his jacket. He starts to point it at them as if he was a slow motion reel. They all pull a gun out and fill him full of holes. He falls to the ground and looks up as everyone in the subway car freak out. He grabs onto one of the shady looking fellow's legs.

Tell her I didn't do it, and if you remember. . tell the ground i'm looking forward to it's embrace.

What the fuck. This motherfucka wanted us to kill ...

And the world closes it's eyes.

a small bit of honesty

The problem isn’t that you aren’t good enough, it’s that you don’t believe that you are good enough and you put yourself down everyday until you believe that you aren’t good at all.

You can’t say that you are good or bad at anything. It’s up to other people to decide whether or not you are good or bad at anything. You will never be able to judge what you have completed in either sense.

You can know when something you do looks better than what you normally do. Or even, feel like you have accomplished more than what you normally have. But You can not judge whether or not it is good, bad, great, fantastic, horrible, or any other describing word.

You can always like what you do and wonder what other people think of the things you do. But instead of befriending people that are interested in the play area you think you are good in. You choose people that are indifferent to it. So therefore you never get a response worth hearing. You probably also friend people that aren’t truthful and will tell you that everything you do is great, because they want to be a good friend.

You don't need someone that wants to be a good friend. You need someone that doesn't have to try to be one.

But if you want to be happy. Do whatever the hell you want to do and fuck the masses. Most of them are morons anyway and won't understand anything you do in the first place.

the best response to get from anything is a confused "it's interesting..."

That's how i know that i'm doing something right.